read newspapers. Not just newspapers, SATURDAY's newspapers.
read 82 pages of Driven By Eternity
Browsed through the entire book on Making Love - The Chapman Guide to making sex an act of love
Read the first few chapters of the 5 Languages of Apology.
Going to read Men's Health now.
Gary Chapman was fast becoming my favourite author. However, I felt that the 5 Languages of Apology a bit salah leh.. He did a good job by identifying the 5 love languages in his previous book, identifying the ways in which people feel most loved; their primary and secondary love languages.
However, I do not see the point in identifying someone's language of apology. The 5 languages of apology are as follows:
1) Expressing regret ( I am sorry)
2) Accepting Responsiblity ( I was wrong)
3) Making Restitution (What can I do to make it right?)
4) Genuinely repenting ( I will try not to do that again)
5) Requesting Forgiveness (Will you please forgive me?)
Aren't these 5 "languages" necessary whenever we do something wrong? Shouldn't the title of the book be 5 steps to Apologising?
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Saturday, February 28, 2009
Friday, February 27, 2009
1 Corinthians 8
Paul speaks in riddles a lot of times. I relish his writing style though.
Reflections from this chapter which I read on Tuesday but never got down to penning down my thoughts.
It is interesting the passage began with " knowledge puffs up but loves build up" . I sort of reflected on my own experience with this, on how sometimes I get so engrossed in sharing about Jesus to people, that I forget their immediate need is to know how much I care about them, not how much I know about God.
People only care about what you think when you show them that you care about them. That is the take home message for me. I praying for God's overflowing love and compassion to be in me for others.
Love is best demonstrated through actions, not thoughts, not talk.
Another lesson that I learnt from this chapter is not to let my right to freedom stumble someone else when this freedom is exercised. It is best summarized by dying to self and living a life that has nothing to prove and nothing to lose.
I think examples would be situations like though I am no longer bound by laws not to drink, do body art (this is subjective), etc.. I do not outwardly declare that it is okay to do so because it could be a stumbling block to both believers and pre-believers especially when the beliefs are not explained properly.
Another situation is not feeling guilt/ shame or condemnation over the wrong things we have done, but announcing to people that we are forgiven no matter what. So knowing a fact doesn't mean we have to shout it out so as to show we have freedom. I think that is an overexercising of my right to freedom.
I guess the bottomline is, ultimately, our walk with God is accountable to Him, but we should take care not to stumble our fellow people.
.
Reflections from this chapter which I read on Tuesday but never got down to penning down my thoughts.
It is interesting the passage began with " knowledge puffs up but loves build up" . I sort of reflected on my own experience with this, on how sometimes I get so engrossed in sharing about Jesus to people, that I forget their immediate need is to know how much I care about them, not how much I know about God.
People only care about what you think when you show them that you care about them. That is the take home message for me. I praying for God's overflowing love and compassion to be in me for others.
Love is best demonstrated through actions, not thoughts, not talk.
Another lesson that I learnt from this chapter is not to let my right to freedom stumble someone else when this freedom is exercised. It is best summarized by dying to self and living a life that has nothing to prove and nothing to lose.
I think examples would be situations like though I am no longer bound by laws not to drink, do body art (this is subjective), etc.. I do not outwardly declare that it is okay to do so because it could be a stumbling block to both believers and pre-believers especially when the beliefs are not explained properly.
Another situation is not feeling guilt/ shame or condemnation over the wrong things we have done, but announcing to people that we are forgiven no matter what. So knowing a fact doesn't mean we have to shout it out so as to show we have freedom. I think that is an overexercising of my right to freedom.
I guess the bottomline is, ultimately, our walk with God is accountable to Him, but we should take care not to stumble our fellow people.
.
Thursday, February 26, 2009
my 35 questions- this is so time consuming lor....
I tag everybady who reads this. :)
1.ONE OF YOUR SCARS, HOW DID YOU GET IT?
Scar above my belly button measuring 3 cm in length. It started with a pimple and grew larger and larger. When the pus came out, it was lumpy. My ex witnessed it. I remembered we were in Hong Kong. She still shudders when we speak about it. Haha.
2. WHAT MUSIC DO YOU LIKE TO LISTEN TO?
Hillsongs, Planetshakers, many types of christian music, and a whole lot of other genre of music. I love ASH and Green Day too!
3. WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING
somebody who loves me to bits and me feeling the same way for her.
4. WHAT DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
The SPE days and my 2 years in Aussieland!!
5. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SMELL?
the fragrance of the one I like
6. WHAT KIND OF HAIR DO YOU LIKE ON THE OPPOSITE SEX?
non-oily hair that I can run my fingers through
7. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PIZZA TOPPING?
It's between Curry Chicken Pizza from Pizza Hut and the Diavola from Modesto.
8. IF YOU CAN EAT ANYTHING RIGHT NOW, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
I can't eat anything anymore. I have eaten enough for the day.
9. WHO IS THE LAST PERSON THAT MADE YOU MAD?
One of my students who kept smiling and talking despite being punished.
10. WHAT WAS THE FIRST GIFT SOMEONE EVER GAVE YOU (OF THE OPPOSITE SEX)?
Opposite sex?? hmm.. this guy I hung out with when I was 18 gave me a bottle of stars. The small stars represent the number of days we know each other, the big stars represent the number of times we go out. He gave me stars monthly for about 6 months. Of course, he stopped after he was certain that I was not interested in going steady with him at all.
11. WHAT IS THE BEST WAY TO TELL SOMEONE HOW MUCH THEY MEAN TO YOU?
Hold them tight and pretend not to let go, and continue to pretend not to let go.
12. WHAT ANNOYS YOU MOST?
People close to me who tries to justify their own actions and not make sense and they still insisting on going on and on and on.
13. YOUR WEAKNESSES?
hah? the need to be physically close to someone I am attracted to.
14. WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST JOB?
Telemarketing for VJ Times. They tried to cheat me, but my 2 dear friends went with me to their storehouse and they took(stole) about 10 books while I was collecting my cheque from them.
15. IF YOU COULD GET PLASTIC SURGERY WHAT WOULD IT BE?
Better skin. Sometimes I do get frustrated with my breakouts especially after durians and chocolates and PMS, altogether!
16. HOW MANY KIDS DO YOU WANT?
I don't want any for now. Maybe I will answer differently in 5 years.
17. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
yeh. The queen of the desert. But that was not in my BC so I don't use that at all.
18. WHICH FINGER[S] IS YOUR FAVORITE?
hmm... nice looking fingers..
19. WHEN DID YOU LAST CRY?
I answered that in the last random quiz. I forgot.
20. WHAT IS YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING CD YOU OWN?
None. Why would it be embarrassing. It's personal preference wat..
21. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
I so love myself lor. I would be friends, good friends and most definitely a lover and lifetime partner with myself :P
22. DO LOOKS MATTER?
for friends, of course not. For partners, I guess I just need to be able to imagine waking up with them for the rest of my life.
23. HOW DO YOU RELEASE ANGER?
badly. I remembered that there was once I drove dangerously. So silly. Fortunately, I seldom get angry. Being angry with kids doesn't count.
24. DO YOU TRUST OTHERS EASILY?
yeh. many of my friends say I am very trusting, and naive. But i do have the tendency to get suspicious too.
25. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TOY AS A CHILD?
I like Barbie dolls, only because they have gorgeous legs. Long, slim, shapely.
26. DO YOU USE SARCASM?
Yes, but I also retreat quite quickly because I do not like to offend people. So I will laugh it off after a while.
27. WHAT DO YOU LOOK FOR IN A GUY/GIRL?
someone who adores me, someone without a strange sense of humour, warm, affectionate, someone who makes me feel special, someone who speaks well and laughs a lot.
28. WHAT ARE YOUR NICKNAMES?
shenny, bao gong, shen shen (auntie in chinese), XL,baby.
29. THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE IN THE PREFERRED SEX?
their hearts.
30. SCARIEST THING THAT HAS EVER HAPPENED TO YOU?
G- Force. THe 25? metres drop from the top to the ground in 1 sec? Scary lor.
31. FAVORITE DRINK?
soft drink - 7 up, Juice - orange, Tea - Green tea, Beer- Paulanar, Wine- Sparkling, Champagne - VCP. & BUBBLE MILK TEA
32. ARE YOU TOO SHY TO ASK SOMEONE OUT?
no. I ask people out all the time. hehe. That's for friends. For potentials, I don't remmeber being bashful at all. Not that there were many potentials in my life.
33. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE NAME:
I like the name Joshua for guys. Can't think of any for gals at the moment.
34. ARE YOU IN LOVE:
no.
35. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE MOVIE?
quite a few. But I like SATC. :)
.
1.ONE OF YOUR SCARS, HOW DID YOU GET IT?
Scar above my belly button measuring 3 cm in length. It started with a pimple and grew larger and larger. When the pus came out, it was lumpy. My ex witnessed it. I remembered we were in Hong Kong. She still shudders when we speak about it. Haha.
2. WHAT MUSIC DO YOU LIKE TO LISTEN TO?
Hillsongs, Planetshakers, many types of christian music, and a whole lot of other genre of music. I love ASH and Green Day too!
3. WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING
somebody who loves me to bits and me feeling the same way for her.
4. WHAT DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
The SPE days and my 2 years in Aussieland!!
5. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SMELL?
the fragrance of the one I like
6. WHAT KIND OF HAIR DO YOU LIKE ON THE OPPOSITE SEX?
non-oily hair that I can run my fingers through
7. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PIZZA TOPPING?
It's between Curry Chicken Pizza from Pizza Hut and the Diavola from Modesto.
8. IF YOU CAN EAT ANYTHING RIGHT NOW, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
I can't eat anything anymore. I have eaten enough for the day.
9. WHO IS THE LAST PERSON THAT MADE YOU MAD?
One of my students who kept smiling and talking despite being punished.
10. WHAT WAS THE FIRST GIFT SOMEONE EVER GAVE YOU (OF THE OPPOSITE SEX)?
Opposite sex?? hmm.. this guy I hung out with when I was 18 gave me a bottle of stars. The small stars represent the number of days we know each other, the big stars represent the number of times we go out. He gave me stars monthly for about 6 months. Of course, he stopped after he was certain that I was not interested in going steady with him at all.
11. WHAT IS THE BEST WAY TO TELL SOMEONE HOW MUCH THEY MEAN TO YOU?
Hold them tight and pretend not to let go, and continue to pretend not to let go.
12. WHAT ANNOYS YOU MOST?
People close to me who tries to justify their own actions and not make sense and they still insisting on going on and on and on.
13. YOUR WEAKNESSES?
hah? the need to be physically close to someone I am attracted to.
14. WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST JOB?
Telemarketing for VJ Times. They tried to cheat me, but my 2 dear friends went with me to their storehouse and they took(stole) about 10 books while I was collecting my cheque from them.
15. IF YOU COULD GET PLASTIC SURGERY WHAT WOULD IT BE?
Better skin. Sometimes I do get frustrated with my breakouts especially after durians and chocolates and PMS, altogether!
16. HOW MANY KIDS DO YOU WANT?
I don't want any for now. Maybe I will answer differently in 5 years.
17. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
yeh. The queen of the desert. But that was not in my BC so I don't use that at all.
18. WHICH FINGER[S] IS YOUR FAVORITE?
hmm... nice looking fingers..
19. WHEN DID YOU LAST CRY?
I answered that in the last random quiz. I forgot.
20. WHAT IS YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING CD YOU OWN?
None. Why would it be embarrassing. It's personal preference wat..
21. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
I so love myself lor. I would be friends, good friends and most definitely a lover and lifetime partner with myself :P
22. DO LOOKS MATTER?
for friends, of course not. For partners, I guess I just need to be able to imagine waking up with them for the rest of my life.
23. HOW DO YOU RELEASE ANGER?
badly. I remembered that there was once I drove dangerously. So silly. Fortunately, I seldom get angry. Being angry with kids doesn't count.
24. DO YOU TRUST OTHERS EASILY?
yeh. many of my friends say I am very trusting, and naive. But i do have the tendency to get suspicious too.
25. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TOY AS A CHILD?
I like Barbie dolls, only because they have gorgeous legs. Long, slim, shapely.
26. DO YOU USE SARCASM?
Yes, but I also retreat quite quickly because I do not like to offend people. So I will laugh it off after a while.
27. WHAT DO YOU LOOK FOR IN A GUY/GIRL?
someone who adores me, someone without a strange sense of humour, warm, affectionate, someone who makes me feel special, someone who speaks well and laughs a lot.
28. WHAT ARE YOUR NICKNAMES?
shenny, bao gong, shen shen (auntie in chinese), XL,baby.
29. THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE IN THE PREFERRED SEX?
their hearts.
30. SCARIEST THING THAT HAS EVER HAPPENED TO YOU?
G- Force. THe 25? metres drop from the top to the ground in 1 sec? Scary lor.
31. FAVORITE DRINK?
soft drink - 7 up, Juice - orange, Tea - Green tea, Beer- Paulanar, Wine- Sparkling, Champagne - VCP. & BUBBLE MILK TEA
32. ARE YOU TOO SHY TO ASK SOMEONE OUT?
no. I ask people out all the time. hehe. That's for friends. For potentials, I don't remmeber being bashful at all. Not that there were many potentials in my life.
33. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE NAME:
I like the name Joshua for guys. Can't think of any for gals at the moment.
34. ARE YOU IN LOVE:
no.
35. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE MOVIE?
quite a few. But I like SATC. :)
.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Afternoon entertainment- I love hyphens
It's not as easy as you might think! Copy and change the answers to suit you and pass it on. It's really hard to only use one-word answers. Be sure to tag the person you received it from!
Can I tag my mei mei, yenew, big cpu, geraff, yanzzz78, redotter, bambina, the other plushies and whoever wants to be tagged.
Where is your cell phone?
table
Your hair?
QBed
Your mother?
rich
Your father?
diabetic
Your favorite place?
alfresco
Your dream last night?
retired
Your favorite drink?
greentea
Your dream/goal?
aussiehouse
What room you are in?
bed
Your hobby?
worship
Your fear?
wrinkled
Where do you want to be in 6 years?
happily-attached
Where were you last night?
Modesto
Something that you aren't?
butch
Muffins?
oatmeal&raisin
Wish list item?
3-day-work-week
Where you grew up?
race course rd
Last thing you did?
isqueezed
What are you wearing?
destinee
Your TV?
lappie
Your pet(s)?
cookie
Friends?
PLUs
Your life?
eventful
Your mood?
mellow
Missing someone?
myself
Car?
half-owned-Jazz
Something you're not wearing?
socks
Your favorite store?
Espirit
Your favorite color?
white
When is the last time you laughed?
today
Last time you cried?
forgot
Who will resend this?
unsure
One place that I go to over and over?
Aussieland
One person who emails me regularly?
facebook
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Can I tag my mei mei, yenew, big cpu, geraff, yanzzz78, redotter, bambina, the other plushies and whoever wants to be tagged.
Where is your cell phone?
table
Your hair?
QBed
Your mother?
rich
Your father?
diabetic
Your favorite place?
alfresco
Your dream last night?
retired
Your favorite drink?
greentea
Your dream/goal?
aussiehouse
What room you are in?
bed
Your hobby?
worship
Your fear?
wrinkled
Where do you want to be in 6 years?
happily-attached
Where were you last night?
Modesto
Something that you aren't?
butch
Muffins?
oatmeal&raisin
Wish list item?
3-day-work-week
Where you grew up?
race course rd
Last thing you did?
isqueezed
What are you wearing?
destinee
Your TV?
lappie
Your pet(s)?
cookie
Friends?
PLUs
Your life?
eventful
Your mood?
mellow
Missing someone?
myself
Car?
half-owned-Jazz
Something you're not wearing?
socks
Your favorite store?
Espirit
Your favorite color?
white
When is the last time you laughed?
today
Last time you cried?
forgot
Who will resend this?
unsure
One place that I go to over and over?
Aussieland
One person who emails me regularly?
.
life is unpredictable
I smell gas. The house below mine could have exploded and I would cease to exist on earth.
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Monday, February 23, 2009
Quotable quotes from Built to Last
finally done with this book by Edmund Chan. With the lack of time, there is really a need to select which books to read. I have heard quite a bit of what is written in the book during IDT. But these are quotable quotes worth paying attention to.
- A thinking disciple is one who takes stock of life and live deliberately.
- We love earthly possessions, not of themselves but as a stewardship to the Lord.
- The essential key to being a loving disciple is loving God.
- We are created in God's image and thus, we are immortal souls, though we now dwell in mortal bodies. We have eternal destinies. And the location and condition of our eternal destiny depends on how we relate in this life to God.
- When it comes to controversial issues of ministry, we maintain an open mind and posture. We seek to understand both sides of the spectrum and adapt a moderate posture without compromising our biblical integrity so as to forge ministry effectiveness and cultural relevance.
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- A thinking disciple is one who takes stock of life and live deliberately.
- We love earthly possessions, not of themselves but as a stewardship to the Lord.
- The essential key to being a loving disciple is loving God.
- We are created in God's image and thus, we are immortal souls, though we now dwell in mortal bodies. We have eternal destinies. And the location and condition of our eternal destiny depends on how we relate in this life to God.
- When it comes to controversial issues of ministry, we maintain an open mind and posture. We seek to understand both sides of the spectrum and adapt a moderate posture without compromising our biblical integrity so as to forge ministry effectiveness and cultural relevance.
.
my first time....
since FCC is preaching the first time series, lemme share my first time with you..
today was the first time I visited QB 10 minutes @ $10. I tried calling the hairdresser @ the salon where I was due to cut my hair twice but they were not available, so out of sheer desperation with the limited time I have, I decided to walk in QB @ AMK hub. Everyone in the store must have known it was my first time. WHen I walked in, I plopped on the sofa seat to wait. THe lady finally signalled me to get a prepaid card. I walked to the machine, placed a $10 in the slot and out came a card. I waited for a further 3 minutes before it was my turn.
My hairdresser wasn't that bad after all, I still retain my crown of glory, plus, they wanted to give me a white comb, FOC! I wasn't carrying a bag with me, so I rejected their gift. The haircut was done under 10 minutes, and they were professional enough. I might conside them again next time! :)
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today was the first time I visited QB 10 minutes @ $10. I tried calling the hairdresser @ the salon where I was due to cut my hair twice but they were not available, so out of sheer desperation with the limited time I have, I decided to walk in QB @ AMK hub. Everyone in the store must have known it was my first time. WHen I walked in, I plopped on the sofa seat to wait. THe lady finally signalled me to get a prepaid card. I walked to the machine, placed a $10 in the slot and out came a card. I waited for a further 3 minutes before it was my turn.
My hairdresser wasn't that bad after all, I still retain my crown of glory, plus, they wanted to give me a white comb, FOC! I wasn't carrying a bag with me, so I rejected their gift. The haircut was done under 10 minutes, and they were professional enough. I might conside them again next time! :)
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wonderful sunday
it is amazing how God affirmed my ministry in service.
Today's sermon at Covenant on Numbers chapter 2 is about knowing our stations and keeping our stations, which basically means to find your area of service in God's kingdom and be faithful to it.
At FCC where Susan was preaching, she flashed the organisation chart with all of FCC's ministries and brought up this question: If Jesus is a member of FCC, which ministry do we think He will be serving in? She turned the org chart upside down and the 2 ministries SAFEHAVEN (LGBT outreach) and SAFEHANDS (Outreach to our community) appeared on top of the slide. SHe said she thinks that Jesus' flagship would be in this part of FCC's ministry. I guess I just felt very encouraged that I am not on the wrong track for now, or so it seems, currently.
God is good, all the time. He puts a song of praise in this heart of mine!
we had wonderful lunch at the hawker centre, laughed a bit, we went back to church for the FOOTPRINTS event, where we played Bingo, danced the Hatziporium, a folk dance of Israel, otherwise known as the chickee dance, a get to know one another in the form of speed dating, laughed a bit more, had durian after the event, laughed some more, hung around the car to talk a bit more, laughed a bit more and finally went retail therapy-ing a bit.
Nice day!
.
.
Today's sermon at Covenant on Numbers chapter 2 is about knowing our stations and keeping our stations, which basically means to find your area of service in God's kingdom and be faithful to it.
At FCC where Susan was preaching, she flashed the organisation chart with all of FCC's ministries and brought up this question: If Jesus is a member of FCC, which ministry do we think He will be serving in? She turned the org chart upside down and the 2 ministries SAFEHAVEN (LGBT outreach) and SAFEHANDS (Outreach to our community) appeared on top of the slide. SHe said she thinks that Jesus' flagship would be in this part of FCC's ministry. I guess I just felt very encouraged that I am not on the wrong track for now, or so it seems, currently.
God is good, all the time. He puts a song of praise in this heart of mine!
we had wonderful lunch at the hawker centre, laughed a bit, we went back to church for the FOOTPRINTS event, where we played Bingo, danced the Hatziporium, a folk dance of Israel, otherwise known as the chickee dance, a get to know one another in the form of speed dating, laughed a bit more, had durian after the event, laughed some more, hung around the car to talk a bit more, laughed a bit more and finally went retail therapy-ing a bit.
Nice day!
.
.
Saturday, February 21, 2009
I jammed with N again!
And it was great. I will prolly try to make it a monthly thing. We used to jam every 2 weeks, she on her keyboard and me on the guitar. I am not as professional as she is but it's just a lovely time of using our instruments to worship the Lord, and we end up feeling refreshed and empowered after the usual 2 hours plus session.
It was a good time of catch up too. I like!
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It was a good time of catch up too. I like!
.
one realisation....
is that the area around my eyes are very sensitive. I get very tensed when someone massages the area very close to my eyes. I get even more tensed up when someone applies facial masque over the eyes even though it was over a piece of cloth. I felt so irritated I wanted to brush her hands away, but vanity prevailed. SIGH. So throughout the entire facial session which lasted a good hour and 40 minutes, I was so tensed I couldn't rest at all.
That was very different from my usual facial sessions; the express 45 minutes kind of cleansing, scrubbing, toning, diamond peeling, brief extracting, cleansing again, peppermint masque, moisturising, and voila! After a power nap of 10-15 minutes, I am refreshed! I much prefer that than the hour and 40 minutes of lots of stuff.
Now my skin is very sensitive, with some red dots here and there because of the intensive extraction. And I got to put on make up this morning to meet the parents. Ouch ouch.
Express ones are good for me.
And don't touch the area near to my eyes especially when I have my contact lens on! :)
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That was very different from my usual facial sessions; the express 45 minutes kind of cleansing, scrubbing, toning, diamond peeling, brief extracting, cleansing again, peppermint masque, moisturising, and voila! After a power nap of 10-15 minutes, I am refreshed! I much prefer that than the hour and 40 minutes of lots of stuff.
Now my skin is very sensitive, with some red dots here and there because of the intensive extraction. And I got to put on make up this morning to meet the parents. Ouch ouch.
Express ones are good for me.
And don't touch the area near to my eyes especially when I have my contact lens on! :)
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Thursday, February 19, 2009
Prayer of my heart
I'm forever yours - PLanetshakers
I give my all to you
Send me and i will go for you
To the ends of the earth
I'll follow after you
I want the world to know
Your love endures forever
Tell me and i'll obey
This is far greater than sacrifice
Trusting you and not myself
Will always lead to blessing
Lord have your way in me
Not my will, yours be done
Here i stand within your presence
Longing for your touch
A thousand days cannot compare
To one day in your courts
Hold me now
And never ever let me go
My jesus, my precious saviour
I'm forever yours
I will worship you forever
I will worship you
http://www.imeem.com/christinasan/music/A0zI0ZqY/planet_shakers_im_forever_yours/
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I give my all to you
Send me and i will go for you
To the ends of the earth
I'll follow after you
I want the world to know
Your love endures forever
Tell me and i'll obey
This is far greater than sacrifice
Trusting you and not myself
Will always lead to blessing
Lord have your way in me
Not my will, yours be done
Here i stand within your presence
Longing for your touch
A thousand days cannot compare
To one day in your courts
Hold me now
And never ever let me go
My jesus, my precious saviour
I'm forever yours
I will worship you forever
I will worship you
http://www.imeem.com/christinasan/music/A0zI0ZqY/planet_shakers_im_forever_yours/
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another meaningful gift, or so I thought.
I just received a gift that set off these overwhelming set of emotions. It reminded me of the past, recalling the experiences of this dear friend of mine and myself, as well as the time we spent together in the group when we were studying in SPE (School of Physical Education), which also included my ex.
The gift is a diary that was given to her by my ex in 1999 as her 23rd Birthday gift. In it was penned poems from then till 2005.
Anywayz, halfway through the writing of this post, I realised that I thought wrongly. I thought it was a gift for me because she said she wanted to pass my gift to me, but she forgot about the gift and the diary was for me to pick the poems I wanted from her for IWD. Heh.
So pai seh. But the diary truly evoked heaps of feelings in me. Enough excitement for the night. :)
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The gift is a diary that was given to her by my ex in 1999 as her 23rd Birthday gift. In it was penned poems from then till 2005.
Anywayz, halfway through the writing of this post, I realised that I thought wrongly. I thought it was a gift for me because she said she wanted to pass my gift to me, but she forgot about the gift and the diary was for me to pick the poems I wanted from her for IWD. Heh.
So pai seh. But the diary truly evoked heaps of feelings in me. Enough excitement for the night. :)
.
Reading for today
I am very glad somebody suggested 1 Cor for QT. So wise. Every chapter has been speaking to me in different ways. Today's chapter 6 is basically summed up in this:
-When you have a grievance against a fellow brother/sister in Christ, share with someone who is like-minded in Christ. It doesn't do any good to gossip with someone else. Actually, do not gossip. Full Stop. Nor are we good testimonies because we are called to love one another with a love that is different. We are set apart.
-Give up the pride/ego for the sake of not stumbling another.
-Die to self - what matters is God's opinion of us, and He is pleased with us when we do what is right.
Lawsuits Against Believers
6:1 When one of you has a grievance against another, does he dare go to law before the unrighteous instead of the saints? 2 Or do you not know that the saints will judge the world? And if the world is to be judged by you, are you incompetent to try trivial cases?
3 Do you not know that we are to judge angels? How much more, then, matters pertaining to this life! 4 So if you have such cases, why do you lay them before those who have no standing in the church? 5 I say this to your shame. Can it be that there is no one among you wise enough to settle a dispute between the brothers, 6 but brother goes to law against brother, and that before unbelievers?
7 To have lawsuits at all with one another is already a defeat for you. Why not rather suffer wrong? Why not rather be defrauded? 8 But you yourselves wrong and defraud—even your own brothers!
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-When you have a grievance against a fellow brother/sister in Christ, share with someone who is like-minded in Christ. It doesn't do any good to gossip with someone else. Actually, do not gossip. Full Stop. Nor are we good testimonies because we are called to love one another with a love that is different. We are set apart.
-Give up the pride/ego for the sake of not stumbling another.
-Die to self - what matters is God's opinion of us, and He is pleased with us when we do what is right.
Lawsuits Against Believers
6:1 When one of you has a grievance against another, does he dare go to law before the unrighteous instead of the saints? 2 Or do you not know that the saints will judge the world? And if the world is to be judged by you, are you incompetent to try trivial cases?
3 Do you not know that we are to judge angels? How much more, then, matters pertaining to this life! 4 So if you have such cases, why do you lay them before those who have no standing in the church? 5 I say this to your shame. Can it be that there is no one among you wise enough to settle a dispute between the brothers, 6 but brother goes to law against brother, and that before unbelievers?
7 To have lawsuits at all with one another is already a defeat for you. Why not rather suffer wrong? Why not rather be defrauded? 8 But you yourselves wrong and defraud—even your own brothers!
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Wednesday, February 18, 2009
some randoms
I just learnt how to spell presbyterian.
i napped yesterday! two and a half hours. I used to share with people that I rarely napped in the afternoon unless I am napping with my partner or unless I sleep only 2 hours the night before. I slept about 2 hours the night before. I crashed immediately after CG too.
I cancelled my facial session because it is at Bishan and I was too lazy to rush to shower, dress up and travel all the way there.
I love chocolate but I shouldn't be eating too much chocolate. heh.
I am a romance freak!
My sister's response to my facebook status (Shen believes in love.. and romance..) was this " ??!! *suspicious" Darn. What does it mean? I can't fall in love, or believe in romance?? I am a bit offended.
Actually, it's cuz my Head of Level (married for 20 years) mentioned she doesn't believe in romance. Also, a dear friend shared some r/s woes with me today. Her woes were because of the lack of romance on her part. Quite sad. I shared some tips when she asked. When you love someone, you would want to do things that will make her feel special right?
The audio bible is one of the best creation ever!
I don't feel like playing tennis anymore. I suck at it. :(
I might have injured my hand yesterday while tennis-sing.
Maybe I should just ask my coach to coach me again. That's like $40 bucks an hour.
I shouldn't be taking anymore tuition students, but there's this korean student recommended by someone. 60 dollars an hour. I ask myself, what is more important? And the answer is - time. No go.
I like writing because I don't feel bad making people listen to me talk.
.
i napped yesterday! two and a half hours. I used to share with people that I rarely napped in the afternoon unless I am napping with my partner or unless I sleep only 2 hours the night before. I slept about 2 hours the night before. I crashed immediately after CG too.
I cancelled my facial session because it is at Bishan and I was too lazy to rush to shower, dress up and travel all the way there.
I love chocolate but I shouldn't be eating too much chocolate. heh.
I am a romance freak!
My sister's response to my facebook status (Shen believes in love.. and romance..) was this " ??!! *suspicious" Darn. What does it mean? I can't fall in love, or believe in romance?? I am a bit offended.
Actually, it's cuz my Head of Level (married for 20 years) mentioned she doesn't believe in romance. Also, a dear friend shared some r/s woes with me today. Her woes were because of the lack of romance on her part. Quite sad. I shared some tips when she asked. When you love someone, you would want to do things that will make her feel special right?
The audio bible is one of the best creation ever!
I don't feel like playing tennis anymore. I suck at it. :(
I might have injured my hand yesterday while tennis-sing.
Maybe I should just ask my coach to coach me again. That's like $40 bucks an hour.
I shouldn't be taking anymore tuition students, but there's this korean student recommended by someone. 60 dollars an hour. I ask myself, what is more important? And the answer is - time. No go.
I like writing because I don't feel bad making people listen to me talk.
.
FCC sermon on Sunday
I heard the rehearsal for worship on Saturday and decided I wanted to go for the full service @ FCC on Sunday. Worship was good. For the sermon, Clarence brought up a few points which I find serve as very good reminders for me in regards ro relationships.
As usual, he would say things that sounds different from what I normally know, but I don't think it's wrong, maybe incomplete but not totally wrong. I know some people think otherwise. :)
Passage was taken from 1 Sam 1 which he says is one of the few passages which relate in details the relationship between 2 persons.
The Birth of Samuel
1:1 There was a certain man of Ramathaim-zophim of the hill country of Ephraim whose name was Elkanah the son of Jeroham, son of Elihu, son of Tohu, son of Zuph, an Ephrathite. 2 He had two wives. The name of the one was Hannah, and the name of the other, Peninnah. And Peninnah had children, but Hannah had no children.
3 Now this man used to go up year by year from his city to worship and to sacrifice to the Lord of hosts at Shiloh, where the two sons of Eli, Hophni and Phinehas, were priests of the Lord. 4 On the day when Elkanah sacrificed, he would give portions to Peninnah his wife and to all her sons and daughters. 5 But to Hannah he gave a double portion, because he loved her, though the Lord had closed her womb. [1] 6 And her rival used to provoke her grievously to irritate her, because the Lord had closed her womb. 7 So it went on year by year. As often as she went up to the house of the Lord, she used to provoke her. Therefore Hannah wept and would not eat. 8 And Elkanah, her husband, said to her, “Hannah, why do you weep? And why do you not eat? And why is your heart sad? Am I not more to you than ten sons?”
9 After they had eaten and drunk in Shiloh, Hannah rose. Now Eli the priest was sitting on the seat beside the doorpost of the temple of the Lord. 10 She was deeply distressed and prayed to the Lord and wept bitterly. 11 And she vowed a vow and said, “O Lord of hosts, if you will indeed look on the affliction of your servant and remember me and not forget your servant, but will give to your servant a son, then I will give him to the Lord all the days of his life, and no razor shall touch his head.”
12 As she continued praying before the Lord, Eli observed her mouth. 13 Hannah was speaking in her heart; only her lips moved, and her voice was not heard. Therefore Eli took her to be a drunken woman. 14 And Eli said to her, “How long will you go on being drunk? Put your wine away from you.” 15 But Hannah answered, “No, my lord, I am a woman troubled in spirit. I have drunk neither wine nor strong drink, but I have been pouring out my soul before the Lord. 16 Do not regard your servant as a worthless woman, for all along I have been speaking out of my great anxiety and vexation.” 17 Then Eli answered, “Go in peace, and the God of Israel grant your petition that you have made to him.” 18 And she said, “Let your servant find favor in your eyes.” Then the woman went her way and ate, and her face was no longer sad.
19 They rose early in the morning and worshiped before the Lord; then they went back to their house at Ramah. And Elkanah knew Hannah his wife, and the Lord remembered her. 20 And in due time Hannah conceived and bore a son, and she called his name Samuel, for she said, “I have asked for him from the Lord.”
Clarence drew some parallels pretty well but I can't really replicate that but these are my takeaways from the sermon.
1) Tend to the 3rd person in the relationship. He didn't say the 3rd person is God, something which I always know. He said when we are in a relationship, there is Person A, there is Person B and there is this 3rd person in between who is a little of Person A and a little of Person B plus a mix of everything. And we need to take time to nurture and grow the 3rd person. I agree.
2) The coping mechanisms you used when you are growing up are the things that hinder the growth of your relationship. I agree too. He said to pray for enlightenment to know what our blind spots are so we are aware. And awareness is the first step to change!
3) Give partner spare time to meet their own needs.
Other takeaways:
- There should be change so there is growth but do not lose yourself.
- There is only love when there is risk of loss.
- There should be a balance between intimacy and space for each other.
.
As usual, he would say things that sounds different from what I normally know, but I don't think it's wrong, maybe incomplete but not totally wrong. I know some people think otherwise. :)
Passage was taken from 1 Sam 1 which he says is one of the few passages which relate in details the relationship between 2 persons.
The Birth of Samuel
1:1 There was a certain man of Ramathaim-zophim of the hill country of Ephraim whose name was Elkanah the son of Jeroham, son of Elihu, son of Tohu, son of Zuph, an Ephrathite. 2 He had two wives. The name of the one was Hannah, and the name of the other, Peninnah. And Peninnah had children, but Hannah had no children.
3 Now this man used to go up year by year from his city to worship and to sacrifice to the Lord of hosts at Shiloh, where the two sons of Eli, Hophni and Phinehas, were priests of the Lord. 4 On the day when Elkanah sacrificed, he would give portions to Peninnah his wife and to all her sons and daughters. 5 But to Hannah he gave a double portion, because he loved her, though the Lord had closed her womb. [1] 6 And her rival used to provoke her grievously to irritate her, because the Lord had closed her womb. 7 So it went on year by year. As often as she went up to the house of the Lord, she used to provoke her. Therefore Hannah wept and would not eat. 8 And Elkanah, her husband, said to her, “Hannah, why do you weep? And why do you not eat? And why is your heart sad? Am I not more to you than ten sons?”
9 After they had eaten and drunk in Shiloh, Hannah rose. Now Eli the priest was sitting on the seat beside the doorpost of the temple of the Lord. 10 She was deeply distressed and prayed to the Lord and wept bitterly. 11 And she vowed a vow and said, “O Lord of hosts, if you will indeed look on the affliction of your servant and remember me and not forget your servant, but will give to your servant a son, then I will give him to the Lord all the days of his life, and no razor shall touch his head.”
12 As she continued praying before the Lord, Eli observed her mouth. 13 Hannah was speaking in her heart; only her lips moved, and her voice was not heard. Therefore Eli took her to be a drunken woman. 14 And Eli said to her, “How long will you go on being drunk? Put your wine away from you.” 15 But Hannah answered, “No, my lord, I am a woman troubled in spirit. I have drunk neither wine nor strong drink, but I have been pouring out my soul before the Lord. 16 Do not regard your servant as a worthless woman, for all along I have been speaking out of my great anxiety and vexation.” 17 Then Eli answered, “Go in peace, and the God of Israel grant your petition that you have made to him.” 18 And she said, “Let your servant find favor in your eyes.” Then the woman went her way and ate, and her face was no longer sad.
19 They rose early in the morning and worshiped before the Lord; then they went back to their house at Ramah. And Elkanah knew Hannah his wife, and the Lord remembered her. 20 And in due time Hannah conceived and bore a son, and she called his name Samuel, for she said, “I have asked for him from the Lord.”
Clarence drew some parallels pretty well but I can't really replicate that but these are my takeaways from the sermon.
1) Tend to the 3rd person in the relationship. He didn't say the 3rd person is God, something which I always know. He said when we are in a relationship, there is Person A, there is Person B and there is this 3rd person in between who is a little of Person A and a little of Person B plus a mix of everything. And we need to take time to nurture and grow the 3rd person. I agree.
2) The coping mechanisms you used when you are growing up are the things that hinder the growth of your relationship. I agree too. He said to pray for enlightenment to know what our blind spots are so we are aware. And awareness is the first step to change!
3) Give partner spare time to meet their own needs.
Other takeaways:
- There should be change so there is growth but do not lose yourself.
- There is only love when there is risk of loss.
- There should be a balance between intimacy and space for each other.
.
Thanksgiving
Our borrowed lives, not our own, yet made beautiful by some of the people who are placed in our lives. Our borrowed lives, not our own, yet enriched by the trials that are placed in our lives.
I think it is a gift of God when I was given the chance to watch over 100 planes fly over my head on Monday and Tuesday.
I think it is a gift of God when 12-14 gals meet up weekly for CG despite a busy work schedule.
I think it is a gift of God when I am given a chance to experience what it feels like to be loved by someone and to love someone.
I think it is a gift of God when friends (straight ones whom I do not catch up with often) look into my eyes and ask me how I have been.
I think it is a gift of God when I am able to go off from work at 1230p.m. this afternoon.
I asked myself a question after yesterday's CG session, something I have asked before a few times but has always served as a good reminder, placing things back into perspective every single time ;
What is the purpose of my existence on earth and what am I living for?
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I think it is a gift of God when I was given the chance to watch over 100 planes fly over my head on Monday and Tuesday.
I think it is a gift of God when 12-14 gals meet up weekly for CG despite a busy work schedule.
I think it is a gift of God when I am given a chance to experience what it feels like to be loved by someone and to love someone.
I think it is a gift of God when friends (straight ones whom I do not catch up with often) look into my eyes and ask me how I have been.
I think it is a gift of God when I am able to go off from work at 1230p.m. this afternoon.
I asked myself a question after yesterday's CG session, something I have asked before a few times but has always served as a good reminder, placing things back into perspective every single time ;
What is the purpose of my existence on earth and what am I living for?
.
A very meaningful gift
The Missing Piece meets the Big O - Shel Silverstein
"The missing piece sat alone...
waiting for someone
to come along
and take it somewhere."
"Some fit...
but could not roll
Others could roll
but did not fit.
One didn't know a thing about fitting.
And another didn't know a thing about anything.
One was too delicate.
One put it on a pedestal...
and left it there.
Some had too many pieces missing.
Some had too many pieces, period.
It learned to hide from the hungry ones.
More came.
Some looked too closely.”
Others rolled right by without noticing.
It tried to make itself more attractive...
It didn't help.
It tried being flashy.
but that just frightened away the shy ones."
"At last one came along that fit just right.
But all of a sudden...
the missing piece began to grow!
And grow!
'I didn't know you were going to grow.'
'I didn't know it either,' said the missing piece.
'I'm lookin' for my missin' piece, one that won't increase....'
one came along who looked different.
'What do you want of me?' asked the missing piece.
'Nothing .'
'What do you need from me?'
'Nothing.'
'Who are you?' asked the missing piece.
'I am the Big O,' said the Big O.
'I think you are the one I have been waiting for,' said the missing piece. 'Maybe I am your missing piece.'
'But I am not missing a piece,' said the Big O.
'There is no place you would fit.'
'That is too bad,' said the missing piece.
'I was hoping that perhaps I could roll with you....'
'You cannot roll with me,' said the Big O,
'but perhaps you can roll by yourself.'
'By myself? A missing piece cannot roll by itself.'
'Have you ever tried?' asked the Big O.
'But I have sharp corners,' said the missing piece.
'I am not shaped for rolling.'
'Corners wear off,' said the Big O, 'and shapes change.
Anyhow, I must say good-bye..
Perhaps we will meet again....'
And away it rolled.
The missing piece was alone again."
"For a long time it just sat there.
Then... slowly... it lifted itself up on one end...and flopped over.
Then lift...pull...flop...
it began to move forward....
And soon its edges began to wear off...
liftpullflopliftpullflop...
and its shape began to change...
and then it was bumping instead of flopping...
and then it was bouncing instead of bumping...
and then it was rolling instead of bouncing....
And it didn't know where and it didn't care.
It was rolling!"
http://osorhan.com/bigo/
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"The missing piece sat alone...
waiting for someone
to come along
and take it somewhere."
"Some fit...
but could not roll
Others could roll
but did not fit.
One didn't know a thing about fitting.
And another didn't know a thing about anything.
One was too delicate.
One put it on a pedestal...
and left it there.
Some had too many pieces missing.
Some had too many pieces, period.
It learned to hide from the hungry ones.
More came.
Some looked too closely.”
Others rolled right by without noticing.
It tried to make itself more attractive...
It didn't help.
It tried being flashy.
but that just frightened away the shy ones."
"At last one came along that fit just right.
But all of a sudden...
the missing piece began to grow!
And grow!
'I didn't know you were going to grow.'
'I didn't know it either,' said the missing piece.
'I'm lookin' for my missin' piece, one that won't increase....'
one came along who looked different.
'What do you want of me?' asked the missing piece.
'Nothing .'
'What do you need from me?'
'Nothing.'
'Who are you?' asked the missing piece.
'I am the Big O,' said the Big O.
'I think you are the one I have been waiting for,' said the missing piece. 'Maybe I am your missing piece.'
'But I am not missing a piece,' said the Big O.
'There is no place you would fit.'
'That is too bad,' said the missing piece.
'I was hoping that perhaps I could roll with you....'
'You cannot roll with me,' said the Big O,
'but perhaps you can roll by yourself.'
'By myself? A missing piece cannot roll by itself.'
'Have you ever tried?' asked the Big O.
'But I have sharp corners,' said the missing piece.
'I am not shaped for rolling.'
'Corners wear off,' said the Big O, 'and shapes change.
Anyhow, I must say good-bye..
Perhaps we will meet again....'
And away it rolled.
The missing piece was alone again."
"For a long time it just sat there.
Then... slowly... it lifted itself up on one end...and flopped over.
Then lift...pull...flop...
it began to move forward....
And soon its edges began to wear off...
liftpullflopliftpullflop...
and its shape began to change...
and then it was bumping instead of flopping...
and then it was bouncing instead of bumping...
and then it was rolling instead of bouncing....
And it didn't know where and it didn't care.
It was rolling!"
http://osorhan.com/bigo/
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Thursday, February 12, 2009
when do you know you are unmotivated at work?
when you start blogging. Waiting for my CCA to start at 1530 and have 3 stacks of marking in front of me. I feel like drinking bubble tea.
Anywayz, I am irritated with this MP Loo guy because I treasure my weekends very much.
Procreation 'not our forte,' says Singapore MP
A Singapore lawmaker has a simple explanation for the city-state's lack of babies: procreation, he says, is "not our forte."
Loo Choon Yong also suggested that because more free time did not necessarily result in more babies, people should work on Saturdays, a report in The Straits Times said.
"We should accept that as a people, our procreation talent is not our forte -- nothing to crow about," Loo told the legislature on Wednesday.
The government announced last year that it would double spending on incentives to address a baby shortage that threatens the city-state's future.
Previous efforts by authorities in the fast-paced, money-oriented and high-stress society failed to significantly raise the number of children.
Government figures say Singapore had a fertility rate of 1.29 babies per woman in 2007, well below the 2.1 children per woman needed for the population to replace itself naturally.
While failing to boost the population, working only five days a week may also have affected Singapore's work ethic, the report quoted Loo as saying.
"I urge the government to take steps to determine whether our productivity and competitiveness have been affected by the five-day week," he said.
Most companies in Singapore work five days a week.
"I have nothing against our young Singaporeans having fun and partying. But I hope they will work as hard as they play," the MP was quoted as saying.
Loo was back in parliament on Thursday and could not be reached.
.
Anywayz, I am irritated with this MP Loo guy because I treasure my weekends very much.
Procreation 'not our forte,' says Singapore MP
A Singapore lawmaker has a simple explanation for the city-state's lack of babies: procreation, he says, is "not our forte."
Loo Choon Yong also suggested that because more free time did not necessarily result in more babies, people should work on Saturdays, a report in The Straits Times said.
"We should accept that as a people, our procreation talent is not our forte -- nothing to crow about," Loo told the legislature on Wednesday.
The government announced last year that it would double spending on incentives to address a baby shortage that threatens the city-state's future.
Previous efforts by authorities in the fast-paced, money-oriented and high-stress society failed to significantly raise the number of children.
Government figures say Singapore had a fertility rate of 1.29 babies per woman in 2007, well below the 2.1 children per woman needed for the population to replace itself naturally.
While failing to boost the population, working only five days a week may also have affected Singapore's work ethic, the report quoted Loo as saying.
"I urge the government to take steps to determine whether our productivity and competitiveness have been affected by the five-day week," he said.
Most companies in Singapore work five days a week.
"I have nothing against our young Singaporeans having fun and partying. But I hope they will work as hard as they play," the MP was quoted as saying.
Loo was back in parliament on Thursday and could not be reached.
.
a thought sparked off by an itch in my foot
6 months ago......
i used to go for foot reflexology once in every 2 weeks
i used to go to the gym at least twice a week
i used to go swimming once a week
i used to go to town to walk walk at least once a week
i used to play on the piano once or twice a week
hmmm.. what do I do with all those hours this year?
However, I don't feel that I wasted those hours.
More laterz. Marking marking marking.
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i used to go for foot reflexology once in every 2 weeks
i used to go to the gym at least twice a week
i used to go swimming once a week
i used to go to town to walk walk at least once a week
i used to play on the piano once or twice a week
hmmm.. what do I do with all those hours this year?
However, I don't feel that I wasted those hours.
More laterz. Marking marking marking.
.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
I learnt a new word today
snooked : When you play pool, your ball kena blocked.
E.g I feel I kena snooked.
Variation of word: self-snooked.
.
E.g I feel I kena snooked.
Variation of word: self-snooked.
.
I like this saying..
"within the sovereignty of God, there is no such thing as pure chance for God's people."
.
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heartbreaker
When G and I were studying in Oz, people always wonder why 2 nice gals like us were still single and available. This guy friend of ours said this to us then," Go out with guys, break a few hearts before you settle down, it's your right." I found it cute then when he shared that he had his heart broken a few times and wasn't bitter about it. It showed me that he accepted that it was part and parcel of being a man. It showed me how much he appreciated women.
I didn't think that it was right to break hearts. I still don't think that it is right to break hearts. I never would do that deliberately. I realised recently that sometimes, just by being the person I am, I have broken a few hearts along the way. I am no saint, I can't help the way I feel sometimes. I don't always have the self-control to restrain the honest feelings that I reveal, whether those are positive emotions or negative ones. I don't always have the ability to handle matters right. I only know that in all that I do, I am sincere and try my best to keep my conscience clear.
The only comforting thing then I thought was that I always try to do the right things which is better than doing something wrong. And I can't always be responsible for how others feel because of my honesty. I struggle with this and how it seems to go against not being someone's stumbling block. I pray for wisdom in handling situations like that and that God will make me a better person each day.
me is no good to be in a r/s with.
me thinks too much. me is too careful. me is too fussy. me has high expectations. me is too high maintenance. me might just be single for the rest of me life.
.
I didn't think that it was right to break hearts. I still don't think that it is right to break hearts. I never would do that deliberately. I realised recently that sometimes, just by being the person I am, I have broken a few hearts along the way. I am no saint, I can't help the way I feel sometimes. I don't always have the self-control to restrain the honest feelings that I reveal, whether those are positive emotions or negative ones. I don't always have the ability to handle matters right. I only know that in all that I do, I am sincere and try my best to keep my conscience clear.
The only comforting thing then I thought was that I always try to do the right things which is better than doing something wrong. And I can't always be responsible for how others feel because of my honesty. I struggle with this and how it seems to go against not being someone's stumbling block. I pray for wisdom in handling situations like that and that God will make me a better person each day.
me is no good to be in a r/s with.
me thinks too much. me is too careful. me is too fussy. me has high expectations. me is too high maintenance. me might just be single for the rest of me life.
.
the post that started with what the doc said
the Doc is right. It is the aircon. That caused the sinus and hence the headache. He said. No more aircon for the time being.
I woke up at 7a.m. to turn it on so I am able to continue to sleep without letting the morning heat wake me. For the past 2 weeks, the weather has made it possible for me to sleep without the aircon.
I finally caved in to taking the day off. I have enough energy to mark, but not enough to teach. Teaching is so physically exhausting, especially when I am not completely well.
170 has died and more to come. God have mercy on the arsonists. Someone asked me why the Australian bushfire affects me more than the other disasters and wars which goes on so often in the world. I guess I feel the connection to Australia, after driving so often past these plainlands; seeing the remains of a forest which has been burnt on more than a few occasions, seeing smoke that indicates that some area has just started burning, seeing small fires along the way.. all these made me able to imagine what it feels to be trapped in the car along the highway with the forests burning on. I see images of houses by these forests and the fire travelling faster than the residents could evacuate. I pray that God will intervene and bring about normalcy in their lives again.
Just last week, 3 Primary 5 boys in my school set the wastepaper basket in the toilet on fire, and that was not the first time. It had happened weekly for the past 3 weeks. Those arsonists start somewhere. It is great responsiblity being parents. I do think the parents are much to be blamed for the way their kids turn out. Teachers are the doctors to remedy the outcome, but medication can only help so much, sometimes, the disease has advanced so much that doctors can only pray and hope for the best.
We do what we can. Time to mark.
.
I woke up at 7a.m. to turn it on so I am able to continue to sleep without letting the morning heat wake me. For the past 2 weeks, the weather has made it possible for me to sleep without the aircon.
I finally caved in to taking the day off. I have enough energy to mark, but not enough to teach. Teaching is so physically exhausting, especially when I am not completely well.
170 has died and more to come. God have mercy on the arsonists. Someone asked me why the Australian bushfire affects me more than the other disasters and wars which goes on so often in the world. I guess I feel the connection to Australia, after driving so often past these plainlands; seeing the remains of a forest which has been burnt on more than a few occasions, seeing smoke that indicates that some area has just started burning, seeing small fires along the way.. all these made me able to imagine what it feels to be trapped in the car along the highway with the forests burning on. I see images of houses by these forests and the fire travelling faster than the residents could evacuate. I pray that God will intervene and bring about normalcy in their lives again.
Just last week, 3 Primary 5 boys in my school set the wastepaper basket in the toilet on fire, and that was not the first time. It had happened weekly for the past 3 weeks. Those arsonists start somewhere. It is great responsiblity being parents. I do think the parents are much to be blamed for the way their kids turn out. Teachers are the doctors to remedy the outcome, but medication can only help so much, sometimes, the disease has advanced so much that doctors can only pray and hope for the best.
We do what we can. Time to mark.
.
Monday, February 9, 2009
I was touched twice today.
Caused me to think back of some good old times I used to have with these 2 friends.
One was in a book that a dear friend gave me. She passed it to me and I thought she wanted me to just hold on to it for her. I didn't know it was for me till she told me so, but since it was in the car, I only opened it today. In it, she wrote that she missed our friendship. :( I really do miss her friendship too, but circumstances cause us not to be able to do very much about it.
Then during dinner, another dear friend surprised me with a bday cake from Modesto, where we had dinner, along with the bday song. It was such a sweet gesture. I didn't quite expect that.
I give thanks for friends like that.
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One was in a book that a dear friend gave me. She passed it to me and I thought she wanted me to just hold on to it for her. I didn't know it was for me till she told me so, but since it was in the car, I only opened it today. In it, she wrote that she missed our friendship. :( I really do miss her friendship too, but circumstances cause us not to be able to do very much about it.
Then during dinner, another dear friend surprised me with a bday cake from Modesto, where we had dinner, along with the bday song. It was such a sweet gesture. I didn't quite expect that.
I give thanks for friends like that.
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reading of the day - 1 Cor 4
I am thankful for the weather in Singapore. My heart breaks for the 120 odd people who died from the fire in Australia. I am praying that God will intervene in the situation.
I am currently on 1 Cor for QT. I like how God is so amazing in speaking through every chapter based on the circumstance of the season. THis chapter is a good reminder for myself. Not to judge anyone or anything because only God knows the thoughts and the heart of another.
".... It is the Lord who judges me. Therefore do not pronounce judgment before the time, before the Lord comes, who will bring to light the things now hidden in darkness and will disclose the purposes of the heart. Then each one will receive his commendation from God."
1 Cor 4: 4-5
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I am currently on 1 Cor for QT. I like how God is so amazing in speaking through every chapter based on the circumstance of the season. THis chapter is a good reminder for myself. Not to judge anyone or anything because only God knows the thoughts and the heart of another.
".... It is the Lord who judges me. Therefore do not pronounce judgment before the time, before the Lord comes, who will bring to light the things now hidden in darkness and will disclose the purposes of the heart. Then each one will receive his commendation from God."
1 Cor 4: 4-5
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2 things..
I remembered these 2 guys who were very persistent in asking me to be their gfs. One is still proposing to me actually.
One thing, I always believe that as long as they are not direct about expressing their interest in me, I can't assume that they like me, and hence reject them even though I might have the vibes about their interest in me.
But after they expressed their interest, and I told them it's not possible due to one reason or another, if they still continue to pursue, I will have to be more curt in my responses to them, and less open. But they will still want to pursue. ANd I often thought, at that moment, I am quite detached, and not quite the warm and affectionate person I am with other friends. Maybe they are too caught up in the pursuit they don't see me as the detached and not so nice person I have become to them.
My ex partners will attest that I am very different as a partner and as a friend. Once I have decided that I will give my heart to someone, I am more affectionate, more expressive, and would want to spend more time with that person. It makes me wonder, whether what they were attracted to before was what they would be expecting when I am in a relationship with them? Maybe they like women who are detached and not so nice? Maybe they don't like women who are more affectionate, more expressive, more "time consuming" How ?
Interesting isn't it? I have yet to come up with a proper response to this. :)
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One thing, I always believe that as long as they are not direct about expressing their interest in me, I can't assume that they like me, and hence reject them even though I might have the vibes about their interest in me.
But after they expressed their interest, and I told them it's not possible due to one reason or another, if they still continue to pursue, I will have to be more curt in my responses to them, and less open. But they will still want to pursue. ANd I often thought, at that moment, I am quite detached, and not quite the warm and affectionate person I am with other friends. Maybe they are too caught up in the pursuit they don't see me as the detached and not so nice person I have become to them.
My ex partners will attest that I am very different as a partner and as a friend. Once I have decided that I will give my heart to someone, I am more affectionate, more expressive, and would want to spend more time with that person. It makes me wonder, whether what they were attracted to before was what they would be expecting when I am in a relationship with them? Maybe they like women who are detached and not so nice? Maybe they don't like women who are more affectionate, more expressive, more "time consuming" How ?
Interesting isn't it? I have yet to come up with a proper response to this. :)
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Sunday, February 8, 2009
My current favourite song..
Divine Exchange - Hillsong
http://www.imeem.com/people/poTc6r/music/jpLg43PG/hill_song_divine_exchange/
My heart is captivated Lord, by You alone
captured by the awesomeness of You alone
melted by the grace and mercy You have shown
I stand in wonder
I reach to you the one who makes the blind eyes see
who breaks the chains of sickness with authority
restoring what was broken
so it may fly again
I live to worship you
I breathe to worship you
all of my days, your face I'll seek
For as I worship you
You lead me to that place
To that place of divine exchange
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http://www.imeem.com/people/poTc6r/music/jpLg43PG/hill_song_divine_exchange/
My heart is captivated Lord, by You alone
captured by the awesomeness of You alone
melted by the grace and mercy You have shown
I stand in wonder
I reach to you the one who makes the blind eyes see
who breaks the chains of sickness with authority
restoring what was broken
so it may fly again
I live to worship you
I breathe to worship you
all of my days, your face I'll seek
For as I worship you
You lead me to that place
To that place of divine exchange
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How has God changed me in the past 2 years..
I am not exactly a leader in church. But crossing over from just being a cg member to be an overall co-facilitator was a learning journey for me.
One of the most important lessons I have learnt is to handle the different aspects of my life in a manner that wouldn't be someone's stumbling block. IDT came along at the right time. I learnt the importance of a deep inner life with God. Worship also crossed over to a new dimension with God, and borrowing J's term, being plugged into God helps me too.
I learnt how to ask the question : Where is Jesus in this? What would Jesus want me to do in this situation? I realised how important it was not to be someone else's stumbling block. I learnt how to take my troubles to God in prayer. I pray for wisdom very often. I pray always to be an encouragement in someone's life. I realised how important a personal QT with God is. I learnt to put God in every equation of life as best as I can. I do not always succeed but I pray to be always growing, growing better with each step of the way.
Life is full of challenges but they truly bring me closer to God. For that I am thankful.
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One of the most important lessons I have learnt is to handle the different aspects of my life in a manner that wouldn't be someone's stumbling block. IDT came along at the right time. I learnt the importance of a deep inner life with God. Worship also crossed over to a new dimension with God, and borrowing J's term, being plugged into God helps me too.
I learnt how to ask the question : Where is Jesus in this? What would Jesus want me to do in this situation? I realised how important it was not to be someone else's stumbling block. I learnt how to take my troubles to God in prayer. I pray for wisdom very often. I pray always to be an encouragement in someone's life. I realised how important a personal QT with God is. I learnt to put God in every equation of life as best as I can. I do not always succeed but I pray to be always growing, growing better with each step of the way.
Life is full of challenges but they truly bring me closer to God. For that I am thankful.
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Settle for nothing less
We only have 1 life to live. What do we give that one life to?
Prayerfully determine a God-given vision, then relentlessly pursue the way towards the vision.
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Prayerfully determine a God-given vision, then relentlessly pursue the way towards the vision.
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Saturday, February 7, 2009
The letter to the 1st aft the Oz group gathering
Dear G,
I was glad to have finally met MW. It was quite amusing when we introduced each other and JS exclaimed in shock " You must be joking, you mean you two have not met??"
I guess I understood where he was coming from. He knew that we were so close during the 2 years that we were studying together and the subsequent years that followed till about a year and a half ago after you knew about my r/s with E. I would prolly be the first one you would bring MW to meet to evaluate how he's like etc. And you two have been a couple for like 6 months?
I guess I also understand that you choosing to let go A and what's his name because of me, and I guess you don't want to lose another one again especially when we have drifted apart considerably since I told you about my r/s with E. And I am saying that there nothing wrong with it. I would have understood if you wouldn't have told him about what had happened between us, because he might not be able to accept that. I do think that you should at least tell him when it comes to the time that you two are ready for marriage knowing how honest you would like to be with the love of your life.
I was disappointed and a bit hurt, that from MW's expression and the subsequent questions(she's your PE classmate?) that he asked you after JS's shocked expression, that you hardly mentioned about your "best friend" that you were good friends with for a year before we spent like 5 years of our lives together as a couple, and another year or two after that as good friends, who meet up at least once a week.
ANywayz, today's gathering was somewhat awkward, cuz I didn't really know where to place myself, and there wasn't lilke a common activity and everyone was doing their own stuff. Caring for babies, u and him watching something on the laptop, and so I went to read the papers, only to have you asked me to watch telly together with the one or two of them who had plopped themselves in front of the telly. I knew you were concerned about the way I felt, just like before, and I thanked you for that, but you didn't make me feel better by asking me to go over to join you all. I mean, what's wrong with reading papers? Did you think that I enjoyed watching what's on telly after knowing me for such a long time? I felt as if you asked me over because you think that I felt left out. You were right but you should know better to just leave me to do what I want.
Later on, after I decided to go over to watch telly, you were sensitive enough to come over to sit beside me and we started catching up a bit. I guess that's what I love about you, about how you care about how I feel, when I am around, that is. I was glad to be able to share with you about what God has been doing with FCC, the CG gals, and what my life has been revolving around. I wished though, you could be more supportive. I find it really sad that you wouldn't meet this group of ladies so dear to me. Perhaps you should question your own decision about living this straight and conventional life, just so you don't regret in future a few years down your marriage, just like some of the people I know at FCC.
Thanks for the durian treat tomorrow. I guess I will talk to you more then.
mini-me
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I was glad to have finally met MW. It was quite amusing when we introduced each other and JS exclaimed in shock " You must be joking, you mean you two have not met??"
I guess I understood where he was coming from. He knew that we were so close during the 2 years that we were studying together and the subsequent years that followed till about a year and a half ago after you knew about my r/s with E. I would prolly be the first one you would bring MW to meet to evaluate how he's like etc. And you two have been a couple for like 6 months?
I guess I also understand that you choosing to let go A and what's his name because of me, and I guess you don't want to lose another one again especially when we have drifted apart considerably since I told you about my r/s with E. And I am saying that there nothing wrong with it. I would have understood if you wouldn't have told him about what had happened between us, because he might not be able to accept that. I do think that you should at least tell him when it comes to the time that you two are ready for marriage knowing how honest you would like to be with the love of your life.
I was disappointed and a bit hurt, that from MW's expression and the subsequent questions(she's your PE classmate?) that he asked you after JS's shocked expression, that you hardly mentioned about your "best friend" that you were good friends with for a year before we spent like 5 years of our lives together as a couple, and another year or two after that as good friends, who meet up at least once a week.
ANywayz, today's gathering was somewhat awkward, cuz I didn't really know where to place myself, and there wasn't lilke a common activity and everyone was doing their own stuff. Caring for babies, u and him watching something on the laptop, and so I went to read the papers, only to have you asked me to watch telly together with the one or two of them who had plopped themselves in front of the telly. I knew you were concerned about the way I felt, just like before, and I thanked you for that, but you didn't make me feel better by asking me to go over to join you all. I mean, what's wrong with reading papers? Did you think that I enjoyed watching what's on telly after knowing me for such a long time? I felt as if you asked me over because you think that I felt left out. You were right but you should know better to just leave me to do what I want.
Later on, after I decided to go over to watch telly, you were sensitive enough to come over to sit beside me and we started catching up a bit. I guess that's what I love about you, about how you care about how I feel, when I am around, that is. I was glad to be able to share with you about what God has been doing with FCC, the CG gals, and what my life has been revolving around. I wished though, you could be more supportive. I find it really sad that you wouldn't meet this group of ladies so dear to me. Perhaps you should question your own decision about living this straight and conventional life, just so you don't regret in future a few years down your marriage, just like some of the people I know at FCC.
Thanks for the durian treat tomorrow. I guess I will talk to you more then.
mini-me
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I have 2 classical guitars
and I am tuning them with my new chromatic clip tuner, thanks to J. :)
DId I mention that an old friend gave me her Yamaha classical guitar? I am so blessed lor..
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DId I mention that an old friend gave me her Yamaha classical guitar? I am so blessed lor..
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Hee
You know how pilots are asked to go on no pay leave for a few months?
Actually, I would volunteer to go on no pay leave if MOE has that system.
Last week has been so tiring I am wondering how long more I can last before, well.. before something happens.
I am just so thankful last week was over. I feel so relaxed having this morning just to laze at home, read the papers, read the bible, write trivial stuff like that, while getting my legs Isqueezed @ the same time. I am praying for a better week ahead.
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Actually, I would volunteer to go on no pay leave if MOE has that system.
Last week has been so tiring I am wondering how long more I can last before, well.. before something happens.
I am just so thankful last week was over. I feel so relaxed having this morning just to laze at home, read the papers, read the bible, write trivial stuff like that, while getting my legs Isqueezed @ the same time. I am praying for a better week ahead.
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Word of the season
I am reminded once again to fix my eyes not on things that are temporary, not to be too concerned about I think it is important. It is not so much what I think is important but what God thinks that is important. All I am required to do, is to do what I am called to do, according to His grace given me.
Divisions in the Church
1 Cor 3:1-14
3:1 But I, brothers, could not address you as spiritual people, but as people of the flesh, as infants in Christ. 2 I fed you with milk, not solid food, for you were not ready for it. And even now you are not yet ready, 3 for you are still of the flesh. For while there is jealousy and strife among you, are you not of the flesh and behaving only in a human way? 4 For when one says, “I follow Paul,” and another, “I follow Apollos,” are you not being merely human?
5 What then is Apollos? What is Paul? Servants through whom you believed, as the Lord assigned to each. 6 I planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the growth. 7 So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God who gives the growth. 8 He who plants and he who waters are one, and each will receive his wages according to his labor. 9 For we are God's fellow workers. You are God's field, God's building.
10 According to the grace of God given to me, like a skilled master builder I laid a foundation, and someone else is building upon it. Let each one take care how he builds upon it. 11 For no one can lay a foundation other than that which is laid, which is Jesus Christ. 12 Now if anyone builds on the foundation with gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, straw— 13 each one's work will become manifest, for the Day will disclose it, because it will be revealed by fire, and the fire will test what sort of work each one has done. 14 If the work that anyone has built on the foundation survives, he will receive a reward. 15 If anyone's work is burned up, he will suffer loss, though he himself will be saved, but only as through fire.
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Divisions in the Church
1 Cor 3:1-14
3:1 But I, brothers, could not address you as spiritual people, but as people of the flesh, as infants in Christ. 2 I fed you with milk, not solid food, for you were not ready for it. And even now you are not yet ready, 3 for you are still of the flesh. For while there is jealousy and strife among you, are you not of the flesh and behaving only in a human way? 4 For when one says, “I follow Paul,” and another, “I follow Apollos,” are you not being merely human?
5 What then is Apollos? What is Paul? Servants through whom you believed, as the Lord assigned to each. 6 I planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the growth. 7 So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God who gives the growth. 8 He who plants and he who waters are one, and each will receive his wages according to his labor. 9 For we are God's fellow workers. You are God's field, God's building.
10 According to the grace of God given to me, like a skilled master builder I laid a foundation, and someone else is building upon it. Let each one take care how he builds upon it. 11 For no one can lay a foundation other than that which is laid, which is Jesus Christ. 12 Now if anyone builds on the foundation with gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, straw— 13 each one's work will become manifest, for the Day will disclose it, because it will be revealed by fire, and the fire will test what sort of work each one has done. 14 If the work that anyone has built on the foundation survives, he will receive a reward. 15 If anyone's work is burned up, he will suffer loss, though he himself will be saved, but only as through fire.
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Friday, February 6, 2009
Thursday, February 5, 2009
since I got tagged twice about 25 random things...
I shall do this here because I don't really know everyone well on my facebook friends' list.
1) I travelled around Tasmania on my own for 9 days when I was 20.
2) I have been using the same fragrance since I was 18.
3) I used to skip tutorials in JC to go for physiotherapy @ the National Stadium to see the local footballers, and that Irish physiotherapist.
4) I had a crush on that Irish physiotherapist and even wrote her a letter before she left for Ireland. She was married.
5) My parents named me Priscilla and I just had trouble spelling that. I don't use that at all becuase it's not in my birth certificate and I don't like the name.
6) My skin is very prone to breakouts.
7) I am a short term project kind of person.
8) I don't believe in paying for a pedigree. I would pay for a mongrel anytime.
9) Aside from heavy metal, I am open to listening to any other kinds of music.
10) I will learn how to play the bass guitar in my lifetime, God willing.
11) There is very little space in my room that people have to walk in a single file when they come in.
12) I have been to every state capital in Australia, including Tassie and NZ.
13) I backpacked 9 countries *UK and Western Europe* in 26 days when I was 20, and spent only $2500 inclusive of airfare.
14) I have 1 secret blog, dedicated to just one person but not read by that person.
15) My bedroom is custom made. I chose the colours of my room, Orange and Blue.
16) My first dog is called Bruno and he was put to sleep because he had mouth cancer.
17) Someone just asked me out for V-day.
18) I am an idealist when it comes to lifelong relationships.
19) I am not a flower and stuff toy kind of person but I love receiving these from the person I love.
20) I have a lump on my lower lip which can only be felt by touching or biting. ;)
21) My secondary friends used to call me Bao Gong.
22) I can laugh and be entertained by Mr Bean's kind of humour.
23) the 2 years in Australia were the best years of my life so far.
24) I am open to falling in love at this moment in time.
25) I will never be tired of spending everyday of my life with the person I love.
I tag punypc, geraff, misfitz25, yanzzz78, wlfrommalaysia, akiki, yenew, ewok, sam I am, chel and whoever who reads this and wants to be tagged. Just let me know. I want to read it too! :)
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1) I travelled around Tasmania on my own for 9 days when I was 20.
2) I have been using the same fragrance since I was 18.
3) I used to skip tutorials in JC to go for physiotherapy @ the National Stadium to see the local footballers, and that Irish physiotherapist.
4) I had a crush on that Irish physiotherapist and even wrote her a letter before she left for Ireland. She was married.
5) My parents named me Priscilla and I just had trouble spelling that. I don't use that at all becuase it's not in my birth certificate and I don't like the name.
6) My skin is very prone to breakouts.
7) I am a short term project kind of person.
8) I don't believe in paying for a pedigree. I would pay for a mongrel anytime.
9) Aside from heavy metal, I am open to listening to any other kinds of music.
10) I will learn how to play the bass guitar in my lifetime, God willing.
11) There is very little space in my room that people have to walk in a single file when they come in.
12) I have been to every state capital in Australia, including Tassie and NZ.
13) I backpacked 9 countries *UK and Western Europe* in 26 days when I was 20, and spent only $2500 inclusive of airfare.
14) I have 1 secret blog, dedicated to just one person but not read by that person.
15) My bedroom is custom made. I chose the colours of my room, Orange and Blue.
16) My first dog is called Bruno and he was put to sleep because he had mouth cancer.
17) Someone just asked me out for V-day.
18) I am an idealist when it comes to lifelong relationships.
19) I am not a flower and stuff toy kind of person but I love receiving these from the person I love.
20) I have a lump on my lower lip which can only be felt by touching or biting. ;)
21) My secondary friends used to call me Bao Gong.
22) I can laugh and be entertained by Mr Bean's kind of humour.
23) the 2 years in Australia were the best years of my life so far.
24) I am open to falling in love at this moment in time.
25) I will never be tired of spending everyday of my life with the person I love.
I tag punypc, geraff, misfitz25, yanzzz78, wlfrommalaysia, akiki, yenew, ewok, sam I am, chel and whoever who reads this and wants to be tagged. Just let me know. I want to read it too! :)
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my darlings..
2 of my ex-students came back to visit on Monday. They were so sweet. They said they miss me. Boys leh! 13 year old boys don't say they miss anyone, except to their gfs. So I was very touched. I bought them lunch, and sat with them for a while though I had 101 things to do.
That sort of thing is one of the rewarding moments of being a teacher.
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That sort of thing is one of the rewarding moments of being a teacher.
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this made me smile
haha.. someone just put on her tagline that she looks like an ox. I asked her why. She said she works too hard. :)
so cute
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so cute
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speed dating...
was interesting.
my first time.
I was late, being stuck on KJE for half an hour achieving only 100 metres in distance. (sigh!)
I met A,C,J,K and WL.
A has 4 tattoos. The oldest one was done when she was 14 - a faded monkey God because her group of friends then were very cheena kind. (Tattoos fade too!). She has a big crucifix on her forearm, a barbwire on her upper arm and another one near her spine. The one at the spine hurts the most. She runs often and does Muay Thai. SHe likes all sorts of food but prefers western food. She likes a variety of food so she goes for buffets. She thinks that the best one she has tasted in from The Line At Shang. She's 31 this year and recruits china workers and displaces them in Singapore. She goes to S L Church opposite Sim Lim occasionally.
C wrote that he's a workaholic. But he said it was A who wrote that for him. He is an FTM transgendered. He decided at the age of 27 that he didn't want to be a butch anymore. He removed his breasts and his womb and started taking hormone jabs. Now he has to take hormone jabs every 3 months. He's 34 this year. His family is supportive of him the way he is now. They only want him to be healthy. He works in the same employment agency as A. They have been friends for 15 years. Sometimes, people calls A his gf but he says both of them cannot make it because he prefers feminine women. I just changed all the pronouns to he/him. I keep forgetting! maybe he's there to support A.
J wrote that she's your normal girl next door. She is an engineer. She has had a few relationships but she seems to like them more than they like her. She studied Computer Science in UQ too! But she was there 4 years earlier than I was. She's 32 this year. She goes to church too. I can't remember if she mentioned it. What she looks for in a partner is that they should be able to communicate and they should have chemistry.
G works at the Sports Council. She takes care of the umpires and makes sure they are around for the SEA GAmes and the upcoming Youth Olympic. G knows a few of my netballer friends, one of them quite dear to me. G recently came into this circle. Her first gf was from the SSC, the second I can't remmeber. It was her second that introduced her to Sayoni, Fridae and PLAY.However, they only go occasionally. She has her own flat though she's only 34. Her family has a condo so she owned this flat with her dad though she's paying for the flat. She has a mini schnauzer which lives at her parent's place. So she has the best of both worlds. She goes back home when she is lonely and wants to see her parents and her dog, but when she is attached, she spends more time in her own flat. She actually wanted to rent out the flat but after doing the renovation, she found the place quite cosy and decided not to. After her ex-gf broke up with her, she has started to think about renting the place out, but just a room because she has many things at her place. She has been attending church for 20 years. B Pres Church. Her 3 exes were not christians, and 2 of them were not supportive of her going to church, like they want to sleep in etc and ask how come she must go church. She is attending this batch of LUSH!
WL shared new things about herself, but I better not share here. Ask her! :)
It's pretty interesting. I like meeting new people and have conversations like that with them. 10 minutes is just nice. Not too long, not too short. I might do this again sometime.
I realised that writing helps me to feel relaxed. I should write more when I am stressed.
.
my first time.
I was late, being stuck on KJE for half an hour achieving only 100 metres in distance. (sigh!)
I met A,C,J,K and WL.
A has 4 tattoos. The oldest one was done when she was 14 - a faded monkey God because her group of friends then were very cheena kind. (Tattoos fade too!). She has a big crucifix on her forearm, a barbwire on her upper arm and another one near her spine. The one at the spine hurts the most. She runs often and does Muay Thai. SHe likes all sorts of food but prefers western food. She likes a variety of food so she goes for buffets. She thinks that the best one she has tasted in from The Line At Shang. She's 31 this year and recruits china workers and displaces them in Singapore. She goes to S L Church opposite Sim Lim occasionally.
C wrote that he's a workaholic. But he said it was A who wrote that for him. He is an FTM transgendered. He decided at the age of 27 that he didn't want to be a butch anymore. He removed his breasts and his womb and started taking hormone jabs. Now he has to take hormone jabs every 3 months. He's 34 this year. His family is supportive of him the way he is now. They only want him to be healthy. He works in the same employment agency as A. They have been friends for 15 years. Sometimes, people calls A his gf but he says both of them cannot make it because he prefers feminine women. I just changed all the pronouns to he/him. I keep forgetting! maybe he's there to support A.
J wrote that she's your normal girl next door. She is an engineer. She has had a few relationships but she seems to like them more than they like her. She studied Computer Science in UQ too! But she was there 4 years earlier than I was. She's 32 this year. She goes to church too. I can't remember if she mentioned it. What she looks for in a partner is that they should be able to communicate and they should have chemistry.
G works at the Sports Council. She takes care of the umpires and makes sure they are around for the SEA GAmes and the upcoming Youth Olympic. G knows a few of my netballer friends, one of them quite dear to me. G recently came into this circle. Her first gf was from the SSC, the second I can't remmeber. It was her second that introduced her to Sayoni, Fridae and PLAY.However, they only go occasionally. She has her own flat though she's only 34. Her family has a condo so she owned this flat with her dad though she's paying for the flat. She has a mini schnauzer which lives at her parent's place. So she has the best of both worlds. She goes back home when she is lonely and wants to see her parents and her dog, but when she is attached, she spends more time in her own flat. She actually wanted to rent out the flat but after doing the renovation, she found the place quite cosy and decided not to. After her ex-gf broke up with her, she has started to think about renting the place out, but just a room because she has many things at her place. She has been attending church for 20 years. B Pres Church. Her 3 exes were not christians, and 2 of them were not supportive of her going to church, like they want to sleep in etc and ask how come she must go church. She is attending this batch of LUSH!
WL shared new things about herself, but I better not share here. Ask her! :)
It's pretty interesting. I like meeting new people and have conversations like that with them. 10 minutes is just nice. Not too long, not too short. I might do this again sometime.
I realised that writing helps me to feel relaxed. I should write more when I am stressed.
.
I am.......
truly exhausted...
I just wanna sleep and sleep and sleep....
It's good that I am just physically exhausted......
Wanna sleep sleep sleep sleep sleep sleep sleep sleep....
want huggle huggle huddle huddle huggle huggle huddle huddle.....
.
I just wanna sleep and sleep and sleep....
It's good that I am just physically exhausted......
Wanna sleep sleep sleep sleep sleep sleep sleep sleep....
want huggle huggle huddle huddle huggle huggle huddle huddle.....
.
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
I feel loved
When people ask me about what dinner plans I have for my birthday, how I am going to celebrate etc, I will tell them that I have CG. They will express shock that I was not celebrating my special day doing something they thought I like.
For those who knows about PLUSH, I tell them that I am very happy to be spending my birthday with the gals even though I had to facilitate last night's session (I put myself down for that since it's the first parable after the introduction that I did, and it's only right that I should set the example to practise what was preached).
For those who didn't know about PLUSH, I told them I went for CG and celebrated with the CG. I didn't rave about how special this group of gals is to me just in case they probed and I wasn't prepared to answer that question.
In any case, a colleague who knows I attend Covenant asked me if I was still attending Covenant. I said yes, but I also attend another church. She asked which. I said Free Com Church. My heart was beating so fast lor, cuz there were other colleagues around.
We shall see what happens from now. :)
.
For those who knows about PLUSH, I tell them that I am very happy to be spending my birthday with the gals even though I had to facilitate last night's session (I put myself down for that since it's the first parable after the introduction that I did, and it's only right that I should set the example to practise what was preached).
For those who didn't know about PLUSH, I told them I went for CG and celebrated with the CG. I didn't rave about how special this group of gals is to me just in case they probed and I wasn't prepared to answer that question.
In any case, a colleague who knows I attend Covenant asked me if I was still attending Covenant. I said yes, but I also attend another church. She asked which. I said Free Com Church. My heart was beating so fast lor, cuz there were other colleagues around.
We shall see what happens from now. :)
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Sunday, February 1, 2009
temptations?
what are the temptations we face nowadays?
Not eating ice cream so our weight can be controlled? Not watching television till late so we can sleep early? Not being online so we can be more productive? Not cheating on our partners so our relationship can last? Not being intimate with someone ahead of time? Do we give in to our temptations? Yeh. I do. And sometimes I think it's so difficult to resist temptations. I am quite ashamed of myself.
Jesus fasted for 40 days and 40 nights and he was hungry. Very hungry. Satan tempted him, he didn't succumb to Satan's temptation. Jesus was weak and powerless. Satan promised Him power. Satan promised him glory and the world. He just needed to say okay and the world was his. He didn't succumb to Satan's temptation.
There is a reason why there is a Maslow's hierachy of Needs theory. Food belongs to the base level, the most important part of life.
Jesus is great, isn't he?
.
Not eating ice cream so our weight can be controlled? Not watching television till late so we can sleep early? Not being online so we can be more productive? Not cheating on our partners so our relationship can last? Not being intimate with someone ahead of time? Do we give in to our temptations? Yeh. I do. And sometimes I think it's so difficult to resist temptations. I am quite ashamed of myself.
Jesus fasted for 40 days and 40 nights and he was hungry. Very hungry. Satan tempted him, he didn't succumb to Satan's temptation. Jesus was weak and powerless. Satan promised Him power. Satan promised him glory and the world. He just needed to say okay and the world was his. He didn't succumb to Satan's temptation.
There is a reason why there is a Maslow's hierachy of Needs theory. Food belongs to the base level, the most important part of life.
Jesus is great, isn't he?
.
hymns or contemporary worship songs?
@ Covenant today, we started with a hymn which I didn't know, so I just sang along, not really being able to feel in tuned with God. The next song was something I know, and I was really ministered. That made me really think of the song The Heart of Worship. Does it matter on the songs chosen, the manner of worship, the way the musicians play? My heart was definitely not prepared to worship God, if not, I would have been ministered even with a song I am not familiar with.
I do think it's important to give our best to God, but I think what's more important is to worship God from our heart, and when we can come to that stage where that happens, we can worship no matter what circumstance we are placed in. Love overcomes everything.
In the midst of worship, this thought came. I tend to think that the christians in very conservative churches, (those who sing hymns and all), though they don't have this aspect of charisma, and the excitement of their life with God (those very silent, contemplative sort), and the aspect of being led by the holy spirit, they tend to be the ones who hold on to God and the things of God better in times of difficulties and trouble. They seem to have greater faith in the things unseen and emotions that are not felt. I think they are indoctrinated to know the God of the bible through what is sure which is the word of God. And I think it's good. On the other hand, some charismatic christians who rely a lot on their emotions to determine if the presence of God is around, etc tend to be the first to fall away or leave when they think that something is wrong if they don't feel a certain way or if their prayers are not met at their timing; the way they expect to feel. The faith they have, though great, is non-enduring at times.. that's how I feel.
I love covenant because of the balance it brings. The hymns chosen are mostly very meaningful, with a mix of contemporary songs which has lyrics that speak about the character of God as per the bible, words about God which we can find in the bible so we are worshipping and meditating on the living word. Grounded in the word, led by the spirit. Yeah.
.
I do think it's important to give our best to God, but I think what's more important is to worship God from our heart, and when we can come to that stage where that happens, we can worship no matter what circumstance we are placed in. Love overcomes everything.
In the midst of worship, this thought came. I tend to think that the christians in very conservative churches, (those who sing hymns and all), though they don't have this aspect of charisma, and the excitement of their life with God (those very silent, contemplative sort), and the aspect of being led by the holy spirit, they tend to be the ones who hold on to God and the things of God better in times of difficulties and trouble. They seem to have greater faith in the things unseen and emotions that are not felt. I think they are indoctrinated to know the God of the bible through what is sure which is the word of God. And I think it's good. On the other hand, some charismatic christians who rely a lot on their emotions to determine if the presence of God is around, etc tend to be the first to fall away or leave when they think that something is wrong if they don't feel a certain way or if their prayers are not met at their timing; the way they expect to feel. The faith they have, though great, is non-enduring at times.. that's how I feel.
I love covenant because of the balance it brings. The hymns chosen are mostly very meaningful, with a mix of contemporary songs which has lyrics that speak about the character of God as per the bible, words about God which we can find in the bible so we are worshipping and meditating on the living word. Grounded in the word, led by the spirit. Yeah.
.
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