The ex and I finally spoke beyond the hi and bye. Kudos to her for taking the initiative to sit with another friend and I. It felt fine though I was aware that I was trying not to have too serious conversation. Maybe I equate serious and quiet to melancholic and emotional. Sigh. I have no idea why I am running away from that when it comes to her. Maybe it's phobia.
Anyhooz, it was good that I was having a conversation before she sat down so I could continue to speak with that friend (general topic so she could actually participate if she wanted to). I was thankful that session was over in about 5 minutes.
As I was reflecting about yesterday, I thought about the song she had posted on fb some time ago (the one I am currently listening to now). To be able to indulge in the love of the father through submission to Him through that song requires a great amount of change within her. To feel that she's changed in that way kinda softens my heart towards her. However, based on experience, it is better to keep a distance before some form of drama comes up in the typical break up get back together kinda drama. I am awfully adament that we are not right for each other but I don't think I am capable nor emotionally strong enough to restore the friendship to that level we had before we got attached. I wonder how others are able to remain friends with their exes. Baffles me still.
Anyhooz. A new start of a week, a new set of blessings and mercies from the Lord. Ganbette!
.
No comments:
Post a Comment